Turning Point

My weekend was going along swimmingly... it included a spontaneous trip to my most favorite place in the world, Walt Disney World, and spending time with my honey. I saw beautiful Christmas displays, watched amazing fireworks, saw exciting parades, and just generally had a great time. Then IT happened... It was time to come home, and I was utilizing an airport wheelchair due to not being able to walk quickly through the aiport without being in a lot of pain (I'll cover the various reasons why in a later post). So, there I am, in a wheelchair, waiting to pre-board with other people needing assistance, and I notice some airport personnel start to snicker and look in my direction. It turns out that two employees were "arguing" over who was going to get the "privelege" of pushing me down the jetway to the plane.

I wish I could describe what it feels like to have people mock you, practically to your face, and become the joke of the day due to the fact that you happen to be overweight. It is one of the worst feelings in the world, and I wouldn't wish that on anyone.

At this point, I understand that they are talking about me, and all but drawing straws to determine which one of them has the unfortunate luck to have me to push down the jetway. So, determined to maintain at least a shred of dignity, I grabbed my cane, had my honey take the rest of my things, and made my way down the jetway by myself. I was so upset that I was shaking, but I was NOT going to let myself fall apart there in the middle of the airport. I actually made it all the way to my seat before I broke down and cried my eyes out. I spent the next hour of the flight crying, hurt to the core by people I didn't even know. Thankfully, I had a sweatshirt with a hood that I was able to pull over my face so that I didn't become the inflight entertainment for the other passengers who may have stopped to gawk at me.

So, this incident has become my turning point. I don't wish to experience anything like that ever again. I am determined to do what I can to make a difference and to become healthier. Unfortunately, there are some things about my physical being that I cannot change, due to illness (again, I will address that in a later post). But, I promise myself, right now, that I will do everything I can, and change the things I can, to become a better person, a healthier person. Eventually I will share pictures, so that others can see, and perhaps be inspired by, the transformation I will be making. In the meantime, I intend to write and share my ups and downs, highs and lows, victories and defeats in the hope that it will make me a better, stronger, healthier me.